Mom and the Evolutionist

close up of monkey

A little girl asked her mother,
“How did the human race begin?”
The mother answered,
“God made Adam and Eve
and they had children, and so all
Mankind was made.”

The next day, the little girl asked
her dad the same question,
“How did the human race begin?”

The father answered,
“Many years ago, there were monkeys from
which the human race evolved.”

The confused girl returned to her
mother and said,
“Mom, how is it possible that you told me
the human race was created by God,
and dad said we developed from monkeys?”

The mother answered,

“Well, dear, it is very simple.
I told you about my side of the family
and your father told you about his.”

The Monkey Speaks His Mind

Three monkeys sat in a coconut tree,
Discussing things as they are said to be
Said one to the others,

“Now listen, you two,
There’s a certain rumor that can’t be true,
That man descended from our noble race,
The very idea is a great disgrace!

“No monkey has ever deserted his wife,
Starved her babies, and ruined her life.
And you’ve never known a mother monk,
To leave her babies with others to bunk,
Or pass them on from one to the other ,
Till they scarcely know who is their mother.

“And another thing you’ll never see,
A monk build a fence ’round a coconut tree,
And let the coconuts go to waste,
Forbidding all other monks to taste.
Why, if I put a fence around this tree,
Starvation would force you to steal from me.

“Here’s another thing a monkey won’t do –
Go out at night and get in a stew,
Or use a gun or club or knife
To take some other monkey’s life.
Yes, man descended, the ornery cuss,
But brother, he didn’t descend from us!”
~Author Unknown

Evolution and the End of Humanity

Two monkeys sat in a coconut tree,
Looking on the mass of humanity.
“Some say man descended from you and me.
We consider and ask, ‘How can this be?’

Tails have dropped off,
there’s no swinging around,
Speaking in words is such a strange sound,
Destined are they, to inhabit the ground.

While evolving upward,
they descended down.
Losing their hair,
and we don’t know why.

Discovering their nakedness,
some were shy.
Covering their shame,
something had to die.
And that became the fashion bye and bye.

No longer using clubs to fight in war,
Hand to hand combat seldom evens the score.
With the push of a button, they now kill more,
While sitting in a chair, as the drones soar.

Yes, it is clear, sitting up in this tree.
Evolution’s the end of humanity.
We are so thankful, though monkeys we be,
We’ve saved our tails, from inevitability.”

~Ken Blue

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