Heartwork: 12 Steps to Avoid Anger

pexels-photo-987585.jpeg

Avoid using grievous word that stirs up anger. “A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger” (Prov. 15:1).

Cultivate a mindset of grace and controlling negative emotions. “A wrathful man stirreth up strife: but he that is slow to anger appeaseth strife” (Prov. 15:18).

Remember that being slow to anger is a mark of a great person. “He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city” (Prov. 16:32).

Give a gift or do a deed of kindness in response to anger. “A gift in secret pacifieth anger: and a reward in the bosom strong wrath” (Prov. 21:14).

Understand that the angry person is foolish. “Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools” (Eccl. 7:9).

Stop being a friend of an angry person. Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go” (Prov. 22:24).

Know that judgment and damnation awaits the angry person who does not repent of this sin. “But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire” (Matt. 5:22).

Make anger a matter of prayer. In one of his publications, Chuck Colson said his lovely wife would rather spend fifteen minutes praying with and for someone than an hour criticizing them. In as far as the believer learns to “pray without ceasing” (1 Thess. 5:17) much anger will be dissipated.

Explain negative feelings to a mature and understanding third party who can advise and lead.  Confess fault to one another. “Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much” (James 5:16).

Realize that expectations of others may never materialize.  Therefore, live with the fact that it hurts less to expect nothing than to hope in vain. Learn to be content. “Let your conversation [manner of life] be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee” (Heb. 13:5).

Do not take offense on behalf of someone when only half of an argument has been heard. “He that passeth by, and meddleth with strife belonging not to him, is like one that taketh a dog by the ears” (Prov. 26:17).

It is true that not all anger is sinful; it is true God is angry at the wicked everyday (Ps. 7:11). Jesus was angry with the Pharisees (Mark 3:5). Paul became angry at Peter’s improper conduct and withstood him face to face. However, most anger is sinful, which is why the command comes to put it off.

Do not defend the indefensible, nor try to justify the unjustifiable. Do not seek for verbal vindication when the heart already knows it is wrong in something said or done.

Leave a Reply